Self-improvement Geek Gifts

'Tell me more about this 6-week plan you tried.'

Keys to Success: Focus, Alertness, Concentration...

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

"No, no, no! -- Self-actualization is the OPPOSITE of enlightenment!"

"Teach yourself what you don't know you don't know."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

"If I 'HAD IT ALL' it would it be enough?"

What else is there to wish for?

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

"The goal is to hate yourself."

"You left your demons here last week."

"Always remember...it takes teamwork to get me that promotion!"

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

Unhappy man with 'rabbit-ear' fingers behind his head.

'And when your mother said that you would never be an Olympic gymnast, how did that make you feel?'

'Meditation centre' 'Coffee, Tea, Enlightment, Refreshments'

'My new cellphone has a 'self-help' program...'

Self Help / Elf Help.

(Man with 'BEFORE sign): 'My wife says I'm a work-in-progress.'

Let go of the restrictions in your own head.

Thanks to therapy, Bob no longer felt like a nobody. He felt like an anybody.

'OK. Lose weight, stop smoking, get fit, get a better job, spend more time with the kids, cut back on the booze, be better with money and buy a speed boat.'

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

"I used to be a medium, but now I'm a large."

"You've got to learn to love yourself. Start by 'Friending' yourself on Facebook."

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"I feel I'm doing fine. My sense of net worth is way up this quarter."

'Even in the mundane tasks, aim for perfection!'

Top Ten New Year's Resolutions

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'