Self-betterment Advocate Pillows

New Year's Resolutions

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"Teach yourself what you don't know you don't know."

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

"The bags under my eyes have combined to form some kind of face backpack."

What else is there to wish for?

"If I 'HAD IT ALL' it would it be enough?"

"Remember how I've always had a hard time asking for help?"

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

Steamed Room: "Man, I feel so much lighter."

Self-esteem room

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

'We've got a special this week on nose hairs!'

You don't believe I could be a supreme court justice! You're ruining my self-esteem! F.Y.I? � Whiny tirades don't look good on a supreme court justice's record. Thank you for your candid assessments. I will certainly consider their merits. Fine judicial temperament. And reject them for their shallow insensitivity! Rejection overruled.

'And when your mother said that you would never be an Olympic gymnast, how did that make you feel?'

Breast Height Chart

Sheep In Curlers

Emoticon Encouragement Therapy

Self Help / Elf Help.

'OK. Lose weight, stop smoking, get fit, get a better job, spend more time with the kids, cut back on the booze, be better with money and buy a speed boat.'

'Mom's Spa'

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

Always remember...you're the best you in the world.

"This tea isn't helping – I'm taking a gummy."

"Hair spray"

"I told the doctor about my problems with anxiety and burnout and he wrote me a prescription for me an one for himself."

"You've got to learn to love yourself. Start by 'Friending' yourself on Facebook."

' You're wonderful.' 'I know.'

'I'm afraid this new self you reinvented has already been patented.'

It's A Breeze