Seduction Strategist Pillows

'Efficiency,' he whispered.

"You get your money back if your don't get laid in seven days."

Banana striptease...

'I sent out for everything.'

I really think I can handle this date on my own. Lemme ask you something. Would you trust me alone with a ybot 340? An Xbox 360? They changed the name? Okay. But you cannot hit on my date. I'm only here to help.

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

'I don't like Gerald as a person, but I like him as a concept.'

"Listen to me, Nathan. Chicks love bad boys."

Yeah, you're right. She's playing hard-to-get.

"O.K., she's sitting fown to write in three...two....one...."

Colin could see that his competitor had obviously done his market research.

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? My wife doesn't have a job. The other night she told me it'd be nice if I helped out a little more at home. So I replied "hey, I don't ask you to come to my place of business and do my job for me." I see. Have you tried the "act like I never said it and wait for her to forget it" routine? Yes, sir. I also, tried the "don't-make-eye-contact-until-she-forgets-it" maneuver. I'm running out of ideas.

"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

"Eres la chica mas linda del mundo."

Planned Parenthood: Not Tonight Dear. I Have a Headache.

'Hank here brings 10 years of top sales experience to our company so let's all try to make him feel welcome while he makes you all look bad...'

"I don't know whether to love you or leave you - but then that's the reality of arbitrage."

Dating the efficiency expert.

'It was so romantic. He got down on one knee, showed me the ring, and proposed--right after we exchanged credit reports.'

I was hoping you might convince him by demonstrating the quality of the product.

'First, you have to stop treating your husband like a child.'

Marriage counselor, living together counselor or a just screwing around counselor.

'Unlike Wall Street, with its strict rules regulating insider trading, 'Love Street' remains un-regulated, and I'm pleases to let you know now, before the official announcement, that the position of Rolf Fusco's girlfriend is open.'

If you are ringing your coach to ask about your next move then we're finished.

"No, I don't think our marriage would benefit from a mission statement."

"I'm going to be a lawyer so I'll be arguing both sides."

"I can't cook, but I can pay."

'By proposing a merger instead of marriage, we can deduct this meal as a business expense.'

Sexy Slot Machine

"Why do I always choose 'The Bad Boy'?"

'Pay no attention, they are a couple of ex husbands.'

"I married for contrast."