Sedentary Satirist Gifts

'How many calories do you burn by downloading apps?'

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

'Prolonged sitting leads to death? What's up with that?'

'Spending less time with your HD TV will result in your having less HD cholesterol.'

"Only 200 steps? But I've been chasing a buck all day long!"

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"You're fired."

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

Trump pardons

UK border controls relaxed.

No-Work Orange

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

Ghostwriting the Bible

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

CIA report

"Yes, one is a dog."

Bookstore, the Politically Incorrect Guide to You.

The prying mantis,

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

"Whoever made Keir Starmer did a sound professional job."

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

"Congratulations, Trumpism. It's ot often we initiate a new horseman."

Please enjoy this culturally, ethnically, religiously and politically correct cartoon responsibly.

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"