Security Questioner Gifts

Surveillance Protester

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"But what if this is all there is?"

"Daddy, why do people pull round pizza from square boxes and cut them into triangles before they eat them?"

"And you need to know this why?"

'If it 'tells' the time, why do I have to look at it?'

Ostrich Curoisities

Nuclear Security Summit

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

"Safe FDIC insured, guaranteed 2.65% APY...check out our new Emotional Support CDs."

Car robbers foiled by mousetraps surrounding a car.

Answers to last week's brain-teasers

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

"And, of course, if I were to get the job and start feeling comfortable here I'd no longer need the security blanket."

"For future security questions, the name of your first pet should include a minimum of eight uppercase and lowercase letters, numbers and special characters."

"What's the new manager going to do? Bite your head off."

ACME, Inc. For the man who has everything. It's a home security company.

Upside down question mark hanging from fishing line.

"To prove I'm human, and not a spam bot, this site wants me to solve the mystery of the universe. Why couldn't they just ask if fire is hot or cold?"

'I don't need your love. I need a 401 (k) and health insurance.'

"Do you think it's an accident of history that Freemasons live in houses and we live in trees?"

'Am I covered if a car falls on my tree?'

Trying to hold on to the question.

Questioning

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Celestial Sadie, In the Western sky after sunset, Jupitor can be seen nearly aligned with Venus. What do you make of this? R. Yates. Excellent question. That reminds me of a long lost civilization, in which there was no such thing as a typo. Where no one ever hit the wrong key because they wrote letters by hand. Eventually, it became so obsessed with speed that it began typing everything, and so inconsiderate that it soon stopped bothering to proo

'Remember when your identity was stolen? I just bought it back on eBay.'

Ted gets nabbed driving under the influence of Leo Buscaglia.

Congestion Eases Inexplicably

'We'd like to visit a peaceful police state away from any terror treats.'

"Is there a section at the bottom for comments?"

'That's our quilt edged investments sorted.'

Frequently Asked Questions

"I forgot my password, so I created a new one. Then, I forgot that one, so I created a new one. Maybe you were right. I should write them down."