Secret Suggestion Sleuth Gifts

"Miss Duxbury, get this one checked for fingerprints!"

$1: Family Secrets

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"What did you think of the encryption article?"

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

Experts through the ages.

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

'Is it one moo for yes two moos for no?'

'How come the rabbit didn't have good luck with the foot?'

"If I don't think it's going to work, will it still work?"

'Excellent sir! Your signature is now completely illegible.'

Cryptologists Anonymous

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

"This can't be soup....where are all the little letters that usually float in it?"

Two men converse secretively

"I write these in my manager's handwriting, so no one will hate me."

Net Zero Superstitions

"I think they're beginning to suspect our science is fraudulent."

'Is there a doctor in the house we can trust?'

"Do you think it's an accident of history that Freemasons live in houses and we live in trees?"

Catholic Priest Gay Mardi Gras

'Oh dear. My husband looks suspicious.'

"This mixture of herbs and spices will rid the casa of ghosts! I will send them fleeing into the night!"

I don't trust that guy.

For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

'It looks fishy to me.'

One of the pyramids of giza has had its top stolen!

"Research tells me they found your DNA in the suggestion box."

"Someone put something rude about me in the suggestion box. Our corporate forensic scientist is analyzing fingerprints, DNA and security video as we speak."

We never went to the moon. The Youtube evidence is conclusive. Not the Van Allen thing again." "Van Allen." It is absolutely impossible for human beings to traverse the Van Allen radiation belt. Explain how the Apollo astronauts passed through that radiation belt without either dying or hulking out. They were exposed to a cat-scan's worth of radiation. It was supposed to be a rhetorical question.

Arthur Conan Doyle

Obvious problem.

"I've taken a vow of chastity with guys living in poverty."