Secret Crush Connoisseur Gifts

'You'll be in even more trouble when I tell your wife what you're thinking!'

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'Love me little, love me long.'

"There goes our early night."

'Father James, I slept with Father Henry from next parish... Is that a sin?' - 'Of course!! You belong to my parish!'

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

'Waiter, this jam tastes of fish!'

At Mary Higgins Clark's book club.

'I know you like romantic things, so I built us this love-nest. Stuck together with my own spit.'

Pizza and Related Searches.

"It's too good. I think it's going to be a forgery, not just a copy."

'HEY,no Tongue!'

Confession Ratings.

Wildlife Refuge

'What d'you mean - you've changed your minds?'

"That's a nice little book. It didn't waste too much of my time."

"Welcome to our private banking group."

"Please don't feel it necessary to make conversation."

"Of course I could tell you more about the job...but then I would have to kill you!"

"Forgive me, Father ... I forgot to take my Beano."

"It's an aggressive little wine with a smoky aftertaste and a hint of vanilla. Guaranteed to help you get your leg over!"

"Careful, Rocky. You're about to give away the secret behind your knockout punches."

'There's lots of fine,honest,upstanding young men out there and she takes up with a banker!'

"No thanks-I'd sooner snog the steeple!"

'Henry wore himself out courting me.'

I bragged about catching a fish a meter in lenght but it was the size of a sardine.

"I haven't read them all but I've read enough to get the general idea."

'Talk about weird cravings: I felt like tofu yesterday...'

The Who's Not Who Guide.

"Hey, can I check out those figure drawings again?"

"Are you confessing or bragging?"