Secret Code Lover Pillows

'You have to send in $5 for a decoder ring to decipher the list of ingredients.'

"Pssst! Do you have anything on American history?"

"The note in the bottle said someone's stranded here, but where is he?"

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

'Is it one moo for yes two moos for no?'

Gigolo Diary

"My new antivirus software makes my computer self destruct if someone tries to hack into it. I mistakenly hit the wrong key when typing in my password."

'They transferred me from catering because I kept spilling the beans.'

Galoots in cahoots

'My date last night was a 10. Of course, I'm using the binary system.'

"I'm internet dating. I'm looking for someone I can morph and tweak."

Zero Tolerance

Computer Dating

"We tried to make it idiot-proof but someone's already made a better idiot."

'It's over'

"Are you two trying to play the imitation game?"

"Of course I could tell you more about the job...but then I would have to kill you!"

'He's really into comic books.'

The secret world of Stephen Harper...

"He's the social media member who chooses to remain anonymous."

"I don't shake hands during flu season. Just scan my QR code."

'... But, you mustn't tell anyone that Daddy's a superhero.'

"Imminent bankruptcy? I think you grossly underestimate the power of my secret decoder ring."

'Well, I could tell you what that medal was for, but then I'd have to kill you.'

"Vinnie, it's time we send our 'friend' a little message."

'The big book is for the 'Smiths'...'

'Nobody said anything about a password!'

"It's true. For years I've secretly had a second blended family."