Secret Agenda Seeker Pillows

'How many times have I told you not to barge in here when I'm looking at my secret agenda!'

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

"Tell Mrs. Pomeroy we've found the source of that strange hint of musk."

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

Message in a bottle being read by a fish

Like lambs to the slaughter, my ass.

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."

New York Netherworld

'Are we there yet, I love surprises.'

"Gee, I never saw that coming."

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

Sweet surprise.

WHACK!

'It's Dick Cheney's biography.'

"I thought you were getting me a dog?"

“Son, that… ‘some this will all be yours’… is now!”

Cupcake jumps out of cake.

You have a major fiasco at 10:30, followed by a shocking scandal at 2:15.

'He hasn't responded to training - he still insists on taking Alec to his slippers....'

Tree Squirrel

"And remember, people, it's better to light a scandal than to curse the darkness!"

Celebrity Gavin Henson

Mr Jefferson Brick Proposes a Toast at the 'Rowdy Journal' Offices

Trump Lashes Out at John Bolton

'Your test results are in, and you're FULL of surprises!'

'So this is what you do while I'm away,'

The Original Gossip Columns

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

"The back flip was a nice touch."

The golfer apologized for all his affairs. The governor regrets all his affairs. So does the former presidential candidate. I don't get the abstinence until marriage idea. Shouldn't it be abstinence AFTER marriage?

Nobody's reding our company blog,we need you to have sex with Mrs Miggins so that we can spice it up!

'Get the net ready, Fred. I think I hooked a big one this time.'

"You're lucky you're a U.S. citizen and this is America! The government has generously offered you five free guesses about what you're charged with and where you're going to be secretly detained."