Secrecy Skeptic Gifts

"Just a minute, this is the gossip I told you last week, and asked you not to repeat."

UK border controls relaxed.

'Due to government surveillance, is my allowance taxable?'

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

Privacy Conference Security

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

'Since PRISM, nothing is 'off the record' any more.'

'If someone sent an email and the National Security Agency did not spy on it, would it still be an email?'

Skip the TSA scans by wearing a Burka

"Your call may be monitored by the CIA, NSA, Russians, Chinese, space aliens..."

"Our constantant surveillance indicates workers are becoming more paranoid."

Obama's surveillance of America.

'CIA Surveillance of my senate committee violates the fourth amendment...'

'But how could me speaking at the Secret New Products Seminar break our Confidentiality Agreement?'

"No, your cats don't bother me. I work under constant surveillance at the office."

"As part of our new privacy policy we stopped using hidden cameras."

'This is you hotel. . . it has no TV, but every room is equipped with CCTV.'

Your DNA is in the database.

"Your calls may be monitored for training purposes..."

Secret Agent Men

Privacy Conference Security

Domestic spying.

Man urinating against wall with sign on back which says 'as seen on CCTV'.

Couple surrounded by security cameras plus film crew. Man says: 'I find the CCTV is quite intrusive in this area.'

This homeland security is getting out of hand.

"That'll keep them out."

'Really, a foreign wine? What will the NSA think?'

Data From a Truck

We try to keep our jam making expertise quiet!

'For your safety, these stalls are monitored by a single person in a discreet location.'

"Dave's away from his desk, I'm afraid. Can I take a message, or read you his browser history."

Go To Sleeeeep Britain. . .

"Prayer is private. It's just between you, God and the NSA."