Second-hand Style Guru Gifts

'I'm looking for some pre-owned pants. Long as they fit, I don't much care whose they were.'

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

Handbag store - "Perfect."

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

'She's so put together!'

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

A women in a shoeshop.

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

"Absolutely not!"

Keeping warm.

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

Mr Metrosexual.

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

'Do you like my little black number?'

At the suit makers

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

Old hippie gives peace sign.

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

His and Her wardrobe's

"A naked dress is perfect when you have nothing to wear."

"That shirt is so last year."

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"Everybody should live in a market economy. It's terrific."

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"I really didn't have a weight problem until they invented skinny jeans."

All it takes is a little willpower and a good metabolism...

"Overkill, dude."