Seat Shotgun Fan Pillows

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

"This seat with extra legroom is great."

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"Yes, go and play, but be careful, there are a few thermals around: make sure you're not lifted too high..."

I travelled to get away from it all. All I got away from was my luggage.

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

"I've heard this airline's got some unusual inflight entertainment."

"Hi! Hi! Hi! Hi!"

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

Gadzook used armour. Only one careful owner.

Caliologist

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

Mass Travel

In addition to dusting crops, McWit now rotates them.

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

Running out of Gas.

"Yes, the migration flight home is always faster, but it's thanks to the prevailing winds, not just because we're keen to get home..."

'Sure I said I love 'new car smell', but not as an aftershave.'

Knight Vision

"Before rising all the way to the executive suite, the fire had its modest start in the company mailroom."

'Scooter' Libby.

'Since you lost your job you're really taking this 'taxi-driver for your kids' thing seriously, Dad.'

'I believe you were first.'

"I didn't know we were supposed to flush them!"

GPS Systems.

'That's the great Scottish Indian fighter, Hawkeye the Noo!'

The Race

Angry pensioner

Big Office: Sat Nav Hire

The Priceless Ming Vase Relays.

E-Scooter/G-Scooter