Search And Rescue Personnel Gifts

"Quick! I see his avalanche beacon."

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

'Trust me, there's nobody to rescue that way...'

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

Woman escapes with cats.

'Put a tick under 'very toxic'.' (New Orleans Toxic Clean-Up Team).

'Arf! Arf!'

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

Privacy Conference Security

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

'You brought my slippers?... What kind of rescue dog are you?!'

They've been inseperable since the avalanche.

Heroic Rescue from a Falling Tower

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

"So, how was your day at work, Dear?"

'Swiss Army Rescue Service. How can we help?'

"The club scene is really changing."

Private Viewing

"Any ideas? I'm terrible with cursive writing."

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

Graffiti on guard's horse

"Aye, but this is the Cairngorms laddie. That'll be �1.15p."

'Says here you can tear phonebooks in half? Well, security could use a man like you in our shredding department!'

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

"911, what is your major malfunction?"

'If you'll excuse me, my car is on fire.'

Fetching some fuel.

St Bernard delivering teddy to avalanche victim

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

Giving Up a Little Privacy

The grim reaper racing a lifeboat to reach a drowning man

Party-Crashing Ban

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"