Sea Life Fan Gifts

Welcome to old age - I come up seven or eight times a night to empty my blowhole, too.

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"You come from a long line of stay-at-home dads: What makes you think you have what it takes to branch out?"

Lazy Octopus

'This isn't either a fad! -- It's a major breakthrough!'

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'

'We'll never get a table - it's a frenzy in there tonight.'

"They fired me...but how was I to know that human businesses don't hunt and eat their clients??"

"Damn! These glasses are useless. . ."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

"We’re a lending aquarium."

Neptune

'I'm sending another scam email requesting money to help free Willy...'

"I was drawing a whale, but I ran out of paper."

"I don't do windows."

'Actually, a broken arm is not such a big handicap for me...'

Olly really didn't know his arse from his elbow.

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

"Take your first left and then keep turning left until you eventually float to the top."

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

How Swordfish Are Born

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

"Wrong window. I’m a sea lion. You need an otter."

'You've changed since we got married.'

'They call me Portugese Man of War, but I'm really just a jellyfish of love.'

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

Whale Shark Thoughts...

'Make up your mind, pal - there are plenty of other fish who'd give their gills for this job.'

'Hey Mum, look what I caught!'

"Oh boy, that was a huge belly-flop..."

'Oh my! He finally proposed!'