Screwdriver Aficionado T-Shirts

"Dad needs a Phillips screwdriver. Who's Phillip?"

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

Award Winning Gardener

"He loves his leaf blower."

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

'Where do I put the batteries?'

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

Home Business - Electric Stapler.

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

CLEAR!

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

The Hammer

A crab with a utility knife claw

"You'll have to excuse my Stuart. He's just showing off his new drill.

"Have you tried turning it on and off again..?"

'I feel like I'm in a rut, too!'

DIY horror.

Crane fishing

'Ok, Bachelor number 2: What's your idea of a perfect first date?'

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

'My axe is all dull! -- Have you been using it to shave your legs again?'

'Well, in the hands of my husbnd it's almost as lethal as a loaded gun.'

Handyman Christmas tree with Tools.

'Why did you get a huge socket wrench set? You never use socket wrenches.'

"I'm looking for a Father's Day gift. What kind of wrench says 'I love you'?"

'Uh oh, I measured the lumber in feet, but you measured it in metric.'

Beavers worshipping a chainsaw.

Cut out and keep your own D.I.Y expert.

...they can't take the factory out of the man - he's off to do some welding.

Handy-lion

'Yes, Ralph, they are nuts, but...'

"Don't disturb Daddy darling: he's just received his new issue of "Basic Tools Monthly"..."

"Everything you need for self-assembly."