Screen Stare Champ T-Shirts

'Why did he cut the chicane - the giant spider isn't on the track, he's on our screen.'

Inclusive speech

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

Taking a peek at the audience

'Is this river good for fish?' - 'Yes, so good the refuse to leave it.'

Ladies

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

'Is there such a thing as over communicating?'

Internet Cafe.

Doctor Bartolo

"I got the part, but I play a waiter."

'It's not dead, honey. You've just never seen it turned off before.'

Von Trapp family masks

Bow

"I think I might go outside. My fresh air app is glitchy today."

Don't put your daughter on the stage Mrs Worthington.

ALMOST SLEEPING BEAUTY

STRIP Hambone: Computer addict

Computer spying.

The Masked Singer

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

"Here's a little song I wrote in prison. Actually, I was at Motor Vehicle renewing my license, but it SEEMED like prison."

Dog picturing himself on stage.

The Poet.

Bird on phone: 'Hold on, I have caw waiting.'