Stadium Scenester T-Shirts

'Don't worry about the condition of the pitch, I've got my best goat working on it.'

"Just be yourself."

"They grow up so fast."

'They all want to play the star.'

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

Theatre Crowd

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

Stephen Fry

Woman crying with happiness.

Waving from Behind the Curtain

'I'm a star!'

E=Emcee Squared

Mr. K's essay is such a drag! Yeah, but I've got to do really well. Twig! You're such a grind! Am not! Life isn't only about grades. I know! But he's directing the spring musical. And my singing won't get me the part all by itself! English: Gateway to the Grammys.

"My first love is the theatre, of course, but you're right up there."

'Some of you may have heard that Dr. Weil is giving HIS talk right now in the next auditorium.'

Bravo!

"They're texting it in."

"If all the world's a stage, I'm beginning to wonder about the PLAYWRIGHT!"

'He's a cheat I tell you - it's just a trick!'

"This next song is for all you a cappella lovers. No strings attached."

And the die is cast!

"Ambitions. . . To . . . Er. . . Um . . . Become. . . Er. . . Um. . . A. . . Er. . . Um . . . Motivational. . . Er. . . Um. . . Speaker."

I didn't dress this way to go unnoticed

'Why did he cut the chicane - the giant spider isn't on the track, he's on our screen.'

'Forget equal ops, darling, we're searching for a female Maria.'

"You don't seem to know your lines." "That's because I'm an understudy."

'I wish your father wouldn't dance at weddings. It's so embarrassing.'

"Chad is doing product placement on the Simpson trial."

'Supporting the arts'

Curtain call

The Kink and I

'We should get out more often, where's the door?'