Scout Skeptic Pillows

"Are you sure he is going to the Scouts every night?"

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

'I'm part of the decision-making process... I'm the 'No' part.'

Privacy Conference Security

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

Alternative Medicine

"God works in mysterious ways."

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

'Since PRISM, nothing is 'off the record' any more.'

'The cow jumped over the moon? The mouse ran up the clock? Steroids, right?'

'If someone sent an email and the National Security Agency did not spy on it, would it still be an email?'

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

"Our constantant surveillance indicates workers are becoming more paranoid."

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

"If they de-regulate this place, we wouldn't have to do all those boring scientific tests."

'I was born with math immunity, so I'm special. I know that.'

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

'CIA Surveillance of my senate committee violates the fourth amendment...'

Obama's surveillance of America.

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

"I totally meant to do that."

'It may look that way... But actually, I'm an atheist

'Because only men can believe than 1 inch equals a mile.'