Scout Skeptic T-Shirts

"Are you sure he is going to the Scouts every night?"

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

'I'm part of the decision-making process... I'm the 'No' part.'

Privacy Conference Security

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

Alternative Medicine

"God works in mysterious ways."

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

"Sure, it's Good News, but is it fake news?"

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

'Einstein's theory of negativity'

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

'Since PRISM, nothing is 'off the record' any more.'

'The cow jumped over the moon? The mouse ran up the clock? Steroids, right?'

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

'If someone sent an email and the National Security Agency did not spy on it, would it still be an email?'

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

"Our constantant surveillance indicates workers are becoming more paranoid."

Holy Roller Church: We accept all denominations, but we are especially fond of $20, $50, $100, & $500...

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

Two plus two equals five. I don't think so. The earth is flat, or maybe it's shaped like a fish. Huh? Many Republican candidates don't believe in evolution!!! Math, science -- who needs 'em really. That's what I said in high school.

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

'CIA Surveillance of my senate committee violates the fourth amendment...'

'I was born with math immunity, so I'm special. I know that.'

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

Obama's surveillance of America.

"If they de-regulate this place, we wouldn't have to do all those boring scientific tests."

"I totally meant to do that."

'It may look that way... But actually, I'm an atheist

"Nothing is as it seems, my son."