Scottish Folklore Fan Gifts

"I don't care what you thought you saw,l there are no such things as people"

"You should get that looked at, laddie."

Another unconfirmed Loch Ness Monster sighting...

'Thank-you God.'

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

Vlad the Inhaler

1847 - Bram Stoker, creator of Dracula was born in Dublin.

The Loch Ness Rowing Team

'...this is Loch Lomand!'

Giant using sheep as cotton buds

"Bigfoot"

I crawled out of a toilet and ate a guy. Say my name 3 times in a mirror. I dare you. No one suspects I'm Slenderman. She took me home. Then she woke up in a tub of ice missing a kidney. Urban Legends-in-Their-Own-Minds.

"Honey, where's the baby?" "The first voyage of Sinbad"

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

"You're ruining our reputation, Bob!"

Wolf to Red Riding Hood: 'No thanks, I'm on a strict grandmother diet.'

Buoyed by his past success, William Tell sought even greater challenges,

'Och lye the news'

"Of course, it may be one of those sting operations!"

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

"Tonight we are going out to plunder, lads!"

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

"I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer."

William Tell's lesser-known first son- Stanislaus Tell.

'What? You used a Welshman? The recipe specifically calls for a scot!'

'Jock's a real gentleman as far as we sheep are concerned... He knows how to play the bagpipes, yet doesn't!'

Edna spots the ever elusive Loch Ness Monster.

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

"I'm referring you to an old gypsy woman."

"You have to practice because if the Devil challenges you to a fiddle contest and wins, he gets your soul."

"I think that's one of those annoying flying drones we've been hearing about!"

"We received another message from that scoundrel Robin Hood, sire!"

"I'm getting too old for this..."