Science Meets Faith Enthusiast Gifts

'I've decided on Michael's DNA idea for now - maybe we'll try Gabriel's DOS system later.'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

"Always with the String Theory."

"What did Jesus order?"

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

The ecumenical dinner party.

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

Diagram of a dark matter halo around a saint.

Monkey's Ejected from the Garden of Eden

"Hallelujah!"

Attila the Nun.

Honk if you're holy.

"Let us recall the parable of Jesus turning the other tentacle."

"You're correct, God doesn't need your tithe, but the church does."

"Stupid HR says you can only fire them..."

"Not only should science be Bible-based, Creationism, but also math, Roman numerals!"

'I believe you're thinking of leaving us, Brother?'

"Do me a favor, chief. Next time you carve something in stone have it spell checked first."

"Oh, I know He works in mysterious ways, but if I worked that mysteriously I'd get fired."

"Great news! It's a light touch regulatory framework."

'No offense, but some of these sound a little PREACHY.'