Schooling Scholar Gifts

"No, dear. You won't still have to go to school when you're Daddy's age. Daddy goes to school because he's a teacher."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

The Bookworm

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

"Mom, please shake my chair. I'm taking a virtual school bus ride before class begins."

'This has been a drill. Had this been an actual test you would have been instructed...'

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

'I'm not happy with his latest school photo.'

Today we learned to count to one.

'I'm supposed to take a geography test and I can't find the right room!'

"I guess it took a pandemic to make me realize school is better than trying to learn stuff online."

'I'm sorry son, parents don't like the 11 plus...'

You wrote a book report on a video game instruction manual?

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

'I asked Will if he wrote it. He said he wasn't sure.'

All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.

"Isn't there an app for this?"

"I think you'll find the pen is writier than the sword."

Super Student

"I didn't say my dog ate my homework. I said Russian bots ate my homework."

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

Children's education

The full moon frenzy strikes again."

"Should we put down what we think is right, or what we think you think is right?"

Wikipedia...

'I have answers to the kind of questions no one likes to ask.'

"What can I say? Second grade just hasn't lived up to the hype."

"Have you been working out?"