Schoolhouse Slapstick Lovers Gifts

Insane clown college.

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 29

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

Beware of Falling Notice.

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

"Tell me, Frankie, what time is it?"

'The first person to learn anything leaves immediately!'

'Sorry, Jimmy... our school has a strict 'don't show, don't tell' policy!'

Billy strip: help with homework.

"Oh well, if you really want to see some scary chest thumping, come with me now and I'll show my school report to my dad..."

"Never mind your technology, in my day we had to deliver our jokes by hand!"

An artist creates a sculpture of a "thumbs up" and is then crushed by it.

"Trust me, boss, he knows his pies...he just needs more retraining."

'Don't I even get to enter a plea?'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

"Is that a piano?"

1715 - Newton discovers gravel.

'Yeah, Kirby, it hurts like hell, but dang if I can't stop wigglin' it.'

"If Timmy Had a Wiener Dog"

"You like woodwork class then, son?"

'...All I can say is, the judge was adamant about his gag order on the case.'

Bunfight at the O.K. Corral

'He's doing it for comic relief.'

'Still getting the hang of laser surgery'

Drama class

Alfredo the knife thrower's first air trip.

"Your son has an unctuous, grasping, power-hungry quality we find unattractive in a five-year-old."

"It's been redacted for security reasons."

George the small-time crook would soon find out that 'sticking his fingers in an ink-pad' was not such a good idea!

"They can't eliminate gymnastics! With our school's overcrowding, we need it!"

'I really don't like it when we're listed in alphabetical order: I'm always last...'

'Look at this, Mom, he got down on his knees to propose and put his back out!'

Police borrows a tricycle to catch a bank robber.