School Stress Reliever Gifts

'Spelling, math, history, geography --now the stupid school wants me to take a polygraph test!'

'The good news is that with a report card like that you won't be sending me to college.'

'I knew 'school ends today' sounded too good to be true.'

"I passed the three R's. Now I need some R and R!"

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

Counting ribs

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

'Apparently, Smith's desk just couldn't withstand the weight of the paperwork we piled on his desk.'

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

Turn, turn and turn.

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

"What do I do to relieve stress? I meditate, about not working here."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

Fight or Flight

Another day at work would be one too many...

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

Mind-Fullness

'Calling Tech Support does NOT count as one of my wishes!'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

"I remember when we first met you were an exhausted young doctor! Now you're an exhausted middle-aged doctor!"

Cat in a flap

Meat Grinder

"You work too hard. You have stress balls!"

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

"I scream! You scream! I can't stop the screaming!"

"I feel your pain."

"My blood pressure stays fine, Doctor, as long as nothing comes between me and my fishing."

Fittd shēt

'Can you see what's causing the hold up?'

Nervous Oral Testing

Tossing computer into canyon.

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'