School Psychologist Gifts

'I can understand you getting upset when they make fun of your little arms, but eating your classmates is not the answer.'

"I don't think it's ADD. It's perfectlt normal for your son to be distracted by squirrels."

"He has Attention Surplus Disorder. I suggest putting him in the back of the room."

"Cancel Culture."

"Don't blame me for the grade, blame Google's algorithms."

Ethics exam cheater.

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

"They grow up so fast."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

Mozart's First Movement - Baby Mozart is sitting on the potty.

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

"She's been so creative lately."

'The child is very illogical'

"That's not how I sat on you."

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

Super-Papi moves swiftly to defeat the evil Electronico!

"We're playing doctor. Do you have any old magazines for our waiting room?"

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

'This has been a drill. Had this been an actual test you would have been instructed...'

"Eventually, you have to stop visualizing yourself doing well on the test, and actually do the test."

"Even when he throws them on the floor, he doesn't want the peas and carrots to touch."

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

'What's play?'

Children's artwork exhibition.

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

"The Langmore Regional High School Inner Debate Team"

"He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites."

"You're welcome."