School Philosopher T-Shirts

"Does school really help people with real life?"

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Could I ask just one question?"

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

"One year closer to college!"

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

Playdough's The Republic

'This test doesn't understand me.'

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

"Should we put down what we think is right, or what we think you think is right?"

I think I can, I think I can ... therefore I think I am...

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

Philosopher trading cards.

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN! "It was mostly okay, but there's way too much micromanagement!"

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

A young positivist.

'Young lady, I'm afraid existential despair is no excuse for not eating your lima beans.'

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

Life after death

"I'm not going to lie. It took a large speaker's fee to get me to say your future is bright."

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"