School Commute Humor Gifts

'I used to commute. Now I transform.'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

Laughing Zone Ahead

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

"I think the teacher who says that I got into trouble today is part of the fake news conspiracy."

The Ekert Saga: 'Ah, another week of school begins...might as well try to make the most of it!...You're crampin' my style, Ekert.'

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

'The dog won't eat my homework.'

'Sorry, Jimmy... our school has a strict 'don't show, don't tell' policy!'

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

"I'm subcontracting math, spelling and geography to my smart phone."

Teacher's pet dog

"You were sent to the principal again for horsing around? That's so unfair!"

"No, Bobby, I won't put you on my do not call list."

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

'My principal wants to see you about my principles.'

'It has cut down on note-passing, glancing at fellow students' test papers and spitballs.'

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

Schoolgirl in canteen: 'The food's great but I wish they'd stop calling it 'pukka tukka'.'

"My dog is a finicky eater. He refuses to eat my homework."

'I know it hasn't any wheels...They're still in the pencil.

'If it makes you feel any better, I gave the kid you copied from the same grade.'

'How do you like school?'

'I'm glad to hear that my son is the class clown.'

First day at school

"You have to not only show your answer, you have to show how you got your answer."

"You can't be needing another break - the kids have only been back a week!"

I will not waste chalk