School Challenges Exclaimer Pillows

'Spelling, math, history, geography --now the stupid school wants me to take a polygraph test!'

Ethics exam cheater.

What do MD and PHD mean? It means the doctor owes a lot of money in student loans.

"Well there's no way I'm going to say 'whom'!"

'The reason the core curriculum seems so ambiguous is that we dot really have a core curriculum.'

'I have answers to the kind of questions no one likes to ask.'

"And just how do you expect to become a made man, son, without a solid liberal-arts education?"

"... And don't come back until you're ready to get funny."

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

"If your dad is truly the King of the Jungle, why can't you ask him to abolish school?"

"Guess what. School is presented without commercial interruption."

Only two months since school started. How long do you get off for summer break, Rudy? Oh, months and months. Just to kick back, sleep in late, have a great time with zero responsibility. Waaaa. Introduction to sarcasm. And I get tons of recess.

'Well if you're sick of seeing me here, and I'm sick of coming in here,let's call a truce!'

'You're FLUNKING me? - Doesn't SENIORITY count for anything around here?'

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

"If you get to be a stay-at-home dad, why can't I be a stay-at-home daughter?"

'Who should be contacted in case of an accident? Why, 911, of course. And these people are going to be teaching my children.'

"I don't know about you, but I don't like being a high school guidance counselor."

'No Mis Evans. You know only substitute teachers are allowed to carry taser guns!'

"Every sixth grade substitute is offered an optional cyanide pill."

"When I said my teacher had no class I meant class was canceled."

Cash For Places - Penbroke College

"Maybe school's a good thing... I mean...where else do hundreds of people with similar backgrounds come together under one roof...all following a daily routine...with guidance and supervision to better themselves and society? Ya know...besides prison?"

I don't need to know any math --- I'm going to be a politician.

"What's the point of school? We can just look all this stuff up on wikipedia."

'Can I go home now, before I get overeducated?'

"Personally, this child would love to be 'left behind.'"

'Teacher says I don't pay attention, I have no retention but I'm great at detention.'

"It's true that I'm overdrawn but the bribes for improving coursework marks are coming in now!"

'What part of school don't you understand?', 'The part between the bells ringing.'

'It's the new guidance counselor. He's lost.'

Remembering the words of his 8th grade Algebra teacher, Moose bought his old middle school and made a mockery out of it.

"There's also a link to my manifesto in the notes section—www.freewilioz.org, articles four and five, respectively."

'They're not the exam results, headmaster. They're the truancy figures.'

"Unruly, talking back, lack of respect...and that's just the parents."