Scholarly Sonnet Pillows

'All I want to know is--when do I get to use the quadratic formula, political facts of South America, frog anatomy, the ecology of Johnson Creek, and the billions of other things I spent twelve years studying so diligently?'

The Bookworm

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

Shakespeare working on his "author's bio"

Too big to fail

Never write a sonnet on an empty stomach

"I'm thinking that now is a good time to start those tutoring sessions."

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

Poetry repairman

'Just tell him two quarts of milk and a pint of cream, Will- it doesn't have to be a sonnet.'

Poetry Buff.

William Shakespeare

The Poet.

'Major poets' 'Minor poets' 'Free agents'

Medical Student

"He's in first grade. He'll get to Zs."

'Oh, come on, Bill, surely you can do better than 'there was an old lady from Nantucket!''

'Cambridge dons of electrical engineering find a way to do toast without going to the buttery.'

Thomas Wyatt

4 Rules For 'Serious' Poets

Algernon Swinburne

"It's a helmet cam. This way I won't miss out on anything if I fall asleep."

Alexander Blok

'I'd like to renew my poetic license!'

"Nice try, but learning by osmosis is not a thing."

"...and so I left Wall Street and made a killing in poetry."

Starting School

'It may seem dull to you now, Harry, but at one time, everything in that book was breaking news.'

"I got the grant! I'm researching whether or not money can buy happiness."

'I'm going for that scholarly look while I try to quit smoking. They're nicotine patches.'

Rupert Brooke.

'We're promoting you to Full Professor, Ferguson -- Here are your elbow patches!:'

Poets Arguing