Scholar Of Humor Pillows

The sixth college sense. 'I see debt people.'

"This looks cool, Mum, a university offering a degree course in Greed."

"Behold the secret to happiness."

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

"Gee, thanks pal."

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

Zenemies.

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

'I don't think the employees like me.'

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding as written and as it would have been written if David Hume had invested in a word processor,

Our college is tuned to the students' every need! Campus Visits. We have body image awareness week. Safe sex awareness week. Bullying, drug use and tolerance awareness weeks. What did I miss? Welcome. History, math or English awareness week? Great idea. I'll suggest that.

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

German School

"What are you doing?"

Bank P45's - 'Cashier number 5 please.'

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

Man with dollar sign on his t-shirt.