Scent Collecting T-Shirts

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

'Now, this one gets about a hundred males to the gallon.'

"Absolutely perfect! How did you know?"

"Have you got one called 'New Car Smell'?"

"You got maybe one that smells like cheese blintzes frying?"

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

Some scents are nonsense.

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

Woman thinking about luxuries.

'Does this perfume have an antidote?'

Old Spice

Pheromones.

Old Book Smell

I'm going for former flower children. Tree's Tree Nursery. Legal pot. Legal grass. Festuca. Carex. Miscanthus.

'This scent goes well with a diamond necklace.'

The Houseplant Cemetery.

"It's less of a spell than it is a signature scent."

'Got anything with a little less musk?'

The Angel's Share

'Sure I said I love 'new car smell', but not as an aftershave.'

'Nothing to give him an excuse to say I smell like a cemetery'

"Of course it's not a mirage - mirages don't wear Chanel No 5."

Flower sniffer

Last Will and Testament: Salt, Pepper, Tarragon, Garlic.

"What pheromone are you using?"

Flytrap nerd.

Florist delivers Cactus to Man on Bed of Nails

"It's for the woman who has everything except a man who knows what she wants."

Excess

"This will make the man in your life wonder where you went."

'I don't care what she'sez. I only dring t'get to the worm.'

'That bacon sarnie fragrance gets them every time!'

Hell's Bells Whisky

"You get your money back if your don't get laid in seven days."