Scent Collecting T-Shirts

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

'Now, this one gets about a hundred males to the gallon.'

"Absolutely perfect! How did you know?"

"Have you got one called 'New Car Smell'?"

"You got maybe one that smells like cheese blintzes frying?"

Woman thinking about luxuries.

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

Some scents are nonsense.

'Does this perfume have an antidote?'

Old Spice

Pheromones.

'This scent goes well with a diamond necklace.'

The Houseplant Cemetery.

The Angel's Share

"It's less of a spell than it is a signature scent."

'Got anything with a little less musk?'

'Sure I said I love 'new car smell', but not as an aftershave.'

'Nothing to give him an excuse to say I smell like a cemetery'

Flower sniffer

"This will make the man in your life wonder where you went."

Flytrap nerd.

"What pheromone are you using?"

Florist delivers Cactus to Man on Bed of Nails

Last Will and Testament: Salt, Pepper, Tarragon, Garlic.

"It's for the woman who has everything except a man who knows what she wants."

Excess

'I don't care what she'sez. I only dring t'get to the worm.'

"You get your money back if your don't get laid in seven days."

A drum covered in candles

'That bacon sarnie fragrance gets them every time!'

Hell's Bells Whisky

This cologne reminds my husband of our first kiss, years ago in the old copy room. It's eau de mimeograph.