Scale Chica Pillows

Critisize your weight.

"The next dance will be ladies' choice."

'Yes, the treestand's maximum weight capacity is 300 pounds, you weigh 301 pounds.'

"I don’t care that muscle weighs more than fat. I only know I work out here and gain 5 pounds!"

Woman Weighing Herself on Two Scales.

What your guitar says about you.

"I gained 10 pounds? I've brought my own bathroom scale for a second opinion."

Weight Gain Denial

'I don't want you to give up eating entirely -- just the food part.'

'No, it's not water. You seem to be retaining food.'

'Well, if I weigh that much after only putting one foot on, I don't think I have the courage to continue!'

Fat lady standing on a weighing machine. Its print out says 'I Quit!'.

Please seat to be weighted.

Woman and scales.

"I wouldn't have to go on a diet if we hadn't gone metric."

'Never mind another doctor -- I'm referring you to the Bureau of Weights and Measures.'

'Sorry, sweetie, but your weight is still the same.'

'Let's try again but NO laughing this time!'

'Your weight second opinion.'

Woman weighing herself sitting on a chair.

'LIAR!'

'...And when it registers over 140 pounds, it automatically triggers the refrigerator lock.'

Lady Justice using metric scales.

'To make matter worse, our combined weight is higher than our credit score.'

'Wine and food doesn't go to waste in this hous, but it does go to waist.'

'No matter what you do, you can't cheat a bathroom scale...'

"My scale certainly has no problem finding those hidden calories."

'Doris, I know how much you weigh. Step on the scale and I'll hand you the fish.'

'You lie!'

"Well done Fred, you've lost a bit more..."

Lady getting her weight taken and machine exploding under pressure.

'I think it's having a core melt down!'

Time Scales

Weight Loss Cheat.