Satirical Television Viewer Pillows

And now it's time for "Critic's Corner." Today, Gene will criticize the basic structure of the universe.

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

"The only hobby we tolerate is working on weekends."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

Creating dummy corporations for dummies.

CHANNEL THIRTEEN TAKES ON THE NETWORKS

Cockroaches struggle to use the ski lift.

Library: Self-Help Books and Blame a 'Rigged' Political System.

Today I am trying to grow a bit of beard...

"How do I know God is not real? For the same reason I know people on TV can't see me."

"Ancient Aztec shaman-kings predicted a coming together of all the cultures of the world, creating a new enlightenment for human beings."

Death Styles of the Rich and Famous

Gogglebollox: Our Queen at 90

D. H. Lawrence

'We've got to stop him watching Robert Peston.'

'We just received a radio signal from Tau-Upsilon that was utter drivel. Do you suppose it was one of their TV shows?'

Best Sellers; Worst Sellers.

Man looks worried, as his fellow castaway reads book: 'Cannibalism for Dummies'.

". . . and if anyone here knows any reason why these two should not be wed, any reason at all, like, say, something that might have happened after a long heart-to-heart and a few too many drinks, for instance, last week maybe, something you felt bad enough to bring to Confession, which you definitely should have, because it's pretty serious- anyway, speak now..."

'For the sake of convenience everybody just calls me Joe.'

The Ultimate Reality TV Show: Apathy Island

'They're clouds, Bob. You can't channel surf.'

"I'm not sure what to watch...'Enterprise' or 'Sabado Gigante.'"

'Which? Covid-19 Variant' Guide.

"Let's stop for a second while my assistant brings me a stiff drink."

'We need more cake shows!'

Bad business inc.

"And now a special report from 'News 4' Science Editor, Dr. Frank Lovell, on how to remove your own gallbladder."

"I know it's a foreign book...but I'm reading it with a local accent."

'I'm determined to get on that ethics committee if I have to bribe or blackmail everyone I know.'

'I don't want surgery...can you just touch up the x-rays?'

TV SALES, 'Will the violence chip block out Sean Hannity?'

'Has the news finished yet?'

"...Selected for redundancy due to lengthy and unexplained absence ... blah...blah..."

Attention: Due to a lack of interest we have dropped the APATHY channel - Sorry for any inconvenience.