Satirical Style Maven Pillows

I'm Not With Stupid.

A man peddles U.S. flags on the sidewalk, next to a man peddling copies of the U.S. constitution

Myths and legends...

'It's cheaper than gas.'

Failure is no an option: "I'd now like to speak on the topic of government bailouts!"

"I ask you, what would life be like without similes?"

"Rumours of a crisis in the NHS are groundless...Spending is up by 2%, management ratios down by 62%..."

The Bland Leading the Bland

"We don't have knock-knock jokes on Christmas."

"Papers late again, Murphy?"

'Poor Adam -- he lost his head start ALREADY.'

The cry rang out. "There's gold in that there castle in the sky!" And the great beanstalk rush of 1849 had begun.

"Oh! I thought that was our party manifesto..."

'He managed to think himself into the box !'

Stay at home

'Yes, they've kept it pretty close to the book.'

"We’ve been told to cut the drugs budget so in future Louella here will be chanting away your pain."

'Harold, wake up, you're supposed to be the tooth fairy tonight.'

Everyone knew it was a hideous style, but nothing was ever said.

It's a gingerbread cyclops....I ran out of raisins!

"Out to Latte"

"An intellectual is a man who can look at a Mondrian without thinking of Battenburg cake."

Dragon toasts marshmallows

Space Turkey Aliens visit a family on Thanksgiving.

'Now don't take this wrong, but it seems the whistling in your ears is just the wind blowing through your head.'

Recycling bins - aluminum, plastic, CEO.

"If I'm not mistaken, that's what the establishment is beginning to look like."