Satirical Style Maven Gifts

I'm Not With Stupid.

A man peddles U.S. flags on the sidewalk, next to a man peddling copies of the U.S. constitution

Myths and legends...

'It's cheaper than gas.'

Failure is no an option: "I'd now like to speak on the topic of government bailouts!"

The Bland Leading the Bland

"We don't have knock-knock jokes on Christmas."

"I ask you, what would life be like without similes?"

Tarzan mobile phone

"Rumours of a crisis in the NHS are groundless...Spending is up by 2%, management ratios down by 62%..."

If this van's a rockin'...

"Papers late again, Murphy?"

'Poor Adam -- he lost his head start ALREADY.'

"Oh! I thought that was our party manifesto..."

After exhaustive auditions, Rudy Park hires a new writer. You should've seen the brawl that broke out between Rowling, Twain and Watterson. They all really wanted the gig … until they heard what it pays. So who'd we hire? Darrin Bell. The guy who draws us. That clown? Shhh!! What? I'm not afraid of him. To be continued …

The cry rang out. "There's gold in that there castle in the sky!" And the great beanstalk rush of 1849 had begun.

'He managed to think himself into the box !'

'Harold, wake up, you're supposed to be the tooth fairy tonight.'

Stay at home

The Beckhams reveal their coordinated World Cup tattoo, hairstyle and outfits for 2010.

Compete with This

The 12 Days of Covidmas

'Yes, they've kept it pretty close to the book.'

"We’ve been told to cut the drugs budget so in future Louella here will be chanting away your pain."

Everyone knew it was a hideous style, but nothing was ever said.

It's a gingerbread cyclops....I ran out of raisins!

Ian Hislop

"An intellectual is a man who can look at a Mondrian without thinking of Battenburg cake."

Bank. All our deposits are federally insured, sir -- to make a withdrawal, you'll need a note from the supreme court.

Dragon toasts marshmallows

"Oh God, beards are so passe."

Space Turkey Aliens visit a family on Thanksgiving.

"Out to Latte"

'Now don't take this wrong, but it seems the whistling in your ears is just the wind blowing through your head.'

"Be honest: Does this shirt make me look like a blockhead?"