Satirical Scene Appreciator Gifts

'Like I promised, an office with a washroom!'

Park & Ride.

'So, I have a few drinks in the afternoon. Your dinner's always on the table when you get in from work, isn't it?'

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

'Besides italics, what can you do?'

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

"Who's got the hammer?"

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

"Nice epic battle between good and evil!"

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

"Housekeeping?!"

'Oh Hi!'

"Steamed vegetables."

Updated Classis: Alice Through the You Tube.

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

Earthlings, show us your sporting interests. This is golf. Hit the ball with the club. This is tennis. Hit that ball with the racket. This is volleyball. Hit that ball with your hand. Hitting, hitting, hitting. It's all so violent. How do you relax? We hit the hot tub.

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

"How long were you in the waiting room?"

The Greek Trampoline

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

Russia Money Laundering

"Amateurs."

"I like his earlier work better, particularly the ones I said I didn't like at the time."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"The wine has subtle hints of expensive pretension, but it's balanced nicely by the screw cap."

Noah's Ark/Single's Cruise

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

Atomic Bear: Part 14