Satirical Cartoons Enthusiast Pillows

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

Trappist Monk Discord

'One final question: Have you ever been disciplined, investigated or suspended for integrity on the job?'

'What does it say, Dad?'

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

"How long before the clinical trials are over?"

'And we have an employee wellness program. By not offering health insurance or sick pay, we encourage wellness.'

You can fool some of the people all of the time - "Send in some of the people, Dorothy."

HELLth Food Sprouts

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

'Steve says that he doesn't understand why the liberals are so glum! They already have a majority.'

DOWN WITH THE KING!, 'Do you know what the PENALTY is for disturbing the peace during wartime?'

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

'Enter His Royal Globalness...'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

"Ok, ok, climate change is not a hoax!"

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

"I don't know how to tell you this, but it looks like you have a brain the size of a walnut."

"Actually, you do have a racist bone in your body."

Santa's Helpers

"If you get married at the Grammy Awards, can your marriage be annulled at the Country Music Awards?"

'Staffers don't report we're managing decline. They report we met our targets and did out job!'

"We didn’t have enough in the budget to replace you with a real robot."

'That's what I like about you Roberts, you're not afraid to get out there and take a risk.'

IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.

Clone Factory