Satire Enthusiasts Gifts

"What do you mean, 'When did I have the time to have an affair??!' I MADE the time!"

"I trust this site to tell the truth."

Performance figures.

The NHS Response to Change: See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil, Wouldn't know Evil if it Sat on His Face.

'Now, Dan, we're all equals here. Have a seat.'

Fat Cat & Accountant - 'How much tax can I avoid by becoming a Philanthropist?'

"So we're agreed-whoever picks the short straw has to cold-call potential donors and try to raise enough money for some food."

"And, for insurance purposes, you must buy insurance."

'I see you have a rich and generous father. You're in.'

Democracy vs. Natural Selection.

Beckett on ice

'I'm currently looking to hire a workaholic who feels the good job he does is compensation enough.'

'I got a detention for not wearing exactly the right uniform for my 'encouraging diversity' lessons.'

'Help! I ran my business like a government.'

"What are you complaining about? It's a level playing field."

'Serving you is our number one job'

Her new doctor even made house calls. Often unexpectedly.

"...but what does the other word mean?"

"Why can't immigrants get dressed like civilized people?"

"Rising fuel costs have forced us to make major design changes. Like the in-dash ATM, in case you run out of gas money."

"It's Bring Your Personal Demons to Work Day."

'Wake up! You've got to take a new disability test...'

Imitate me, formerly 'Think'.

'A cardboard box in the Hamptons...That's the American dream!'

"Don't worry -- I'm tweeting that climate change is fake."

'Isn't it nice to see them using their knife and fork.'

Proud Parents of Underachievers

Papal Opposition to Modern Civilisation

"Careful—some of our children's firearms are manufactured in plants that also process nuts and nut products."

"Behavioural insights, eh? Say no more!"

1999: The customer is always a right pain in the...

"Hold on a tick...did you vote for this? I didn't vote for this!"

'Bad news, Americans are now doing the jobs we used to do.'

'I'm feeling a bit cynical this year. Just bring me cash.'

Complaints (high up)