Sarcastic Law Enthusiast Gifts

"I'm suing my scales manufacturer for slander!"

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

Violent Crime Statistics

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

Lady Justice.

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

Baby's first words.

"To be honest, I'm not sure if you marking your territory is legally binding in a boundary claim dispute."

"I don't see any mention of quicksand skills on your resume."

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'

'Your honour, we find the defendent 'politically incorrect'.'

Two lawyers in a royal court

Roman Emperor Trump Pointing to El Salvador

Frank abuses the Power of Attorney.

"I'm enjoying law school but I don't want to be known as the attorney from hell."

Dumping The Death Penalty

'Slap me and I'll see you in court.'

"Our immigration lawyer is now living in Guatemala."

'Speak of the devil, there's my attorney now.'

There's no such thing as "The Fruit Basket Defense." By any chance, are you referring to "The Fruit of the Poisonous Tree"? That's evidence that was obtained by an illegal action and must be considered inadmissible. Yeah! What you said!!!

'And the good news is you can finish out your 'Employee-of-the-Month' term before cleaning out your desk.'

The Unknown Attorney: The First To Double His Billable Rate.