Sarcastic Critic Of Tv Pillows

"It appears the people of Atlantis not only had TV but boring, stupid programming!"

The transparent safe box of Panama

Redhead

'I had to stamp down on staff using nicknames at work. They even had one for me!'

"White Collar Prison"

'Don't give up hope, Senator- We've worked out a plan to decrease your name recognition.'

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

'Never roll your eyes while the boss is talking.'

Gogglebollox: Our Queen at 90

'He lost his whistle,'

"... and God bless my mom and her courage to call this food."

Bad Influence of TV

I think when they talk about 'taking more excercise' they meant more than lifting the remote control.

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

"I want you to drink more beer, eat more fatty foods and take less exercise."

"I see that there's an excellent sale on diddly-squat at the Zilchtown Mall in Nowheresville, New Jersey."

"Hey, if we're getting laid off, it's every man for himself!"

Attention: Due to a lack of interest we have dropped the APATHY channel - Sorry for any inconvenience.

Finally, a big puffy hand for the losing team.

TV SALES, 'Will the violence chip block out Sean Hannity?'

'Oh he's sporty all right - he can be up and down on his stairlift in under ten minutes'

"You think you have the boss from hell?!"

"It's a 'get worse soon card' from your ex wife."

'If looks could sue, eh, Walt?'

"Mine has a terrible battery life."

"The news you are about to see is fictitious and is shown merely for its sensational content."

"Don't look at me. I'm just the gay friend."

"Oh, please, do tell me what Warren Buffett has to say about adding bleach to delicates."

Warning! The next programme contains no celebrities.

'Like it'll do any good.'

Big Brother.