Santa Stories Lover Pillows

'Perhaps you could tell us HOW you know if we've been bad or good?'

"We don't care about his nose. We won't let him play because he's not vaccinated and won't wear a mask!"

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

"Figure it out, Sherlock! I'm a lovebird. You're a lovebird. We're cooped-up together in this cage 24 hours a day! Sooner or later it was bound to happen."

Rudolph wasn't the only one who used to like to play Reindeer Games.

"Was she a roaming Catholic?"

Lost santa and reindeer.

Joe and Sally started an on-screen romance.

"Well, it's either this or you hang out with that guy forever."

Santa Claus uses drones to deliver presents on Christmas.

'You're seeing someone else, aren't you?'

"We've been dating for five years. Can I have Thursdays off please?"

"We love Santa, but Santa didn't know as much about investing as he thought he did."

"We have had a flood warning. But we' re just waiting for Michael Fish to confirm it."

"I've got this awful feeling we took the wrong boat!"

Godzilla Auditions For Store Santa

"Your job application looks great. Just out of curiosity though, exactly how long have you been dead?"

Mouse on mouse action.

"I need a pony for a school project. Share and tell."

'He says he's a friend of the Santa Claus.'

"Can you believe it? Smiley kissed me! I was totally not expecting it. She's probably gonna blabber it to the whole school! If I'm lucky."

Santa uses reindeer parts.

"Do I look fat in this?"

'Crowd control has never been easier since this Moses guy joined up.'

"Yes, a glass of milk and cookies for Santa is common, but when you find carrots for the reindeers, you know for sure it's a nice kid's house..."

"I don't think he believes I've been a good little boy. He told me to go home and go to my room."

"He had a list of women... He was sneaking out to their houses at night, giving them gifts..."

"...and while you're at it, pick yourself up a pair of nose-hair clippers."

Santa LOL.

"Because we caught him betting on them - that's why he can't play in any reindeer games."

Border Security

Lesser-known phases of the moon. Hey! Rebellious. Why does earth keep staring at me? Awkward. Shy. Immature.

'Father Christmas regrets to inform you that your application for presents has been unsuccessful on this occasion.'

Rudolph's Mask