Santa's Little Lawyer T-Shirts

'Naughty or nice? I refuse to answer on the grounds that it might incriminate me.'

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

"No, you definitely wouldn't get Christmas Eve off."

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

Santa's Helpers

Santa knows he has to be more careful. One more accident due to pilot error, and the FAA would take away his pilot's license for good.

"Donner and Blitzen are just our stage names."

The other days of the year...

"So yes, I bit him! How was I supposed to know it was Master wearing a red fat-suit and a fake white beard?"

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

Kid Hints To Santa That He Wants A Bicycle For Christmas

"We're history, Rudolph....I tell ya, we're history."

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"

"Hold still, it's a programme about making your own tv cabinet."

Santa Claus and the Snowman Cross Paths

'I mind my mother, and I do my lessons, and I'm here for the quid pro quo.'

Shelf on an elf

Child on Christmas Eve

Father Christmas deciding whether the Tory Party are naughty or nice.

'If you ever need any help with your bookkeeping, I got an A in arithmetic!'

'...and it absolutely must be assembled!'

'I hear your distribution network is second to none.'

'They can be a real menace at this time of year.'

'Sixteen home runs, 34 runs batted in, and nine stolen bases. I'd call that being good.'

Children Plead with Santa Claus

"It's only weeks to Christmas. We have him right where we want him."

Santa asks man if cholesterol is naught or nice.

Undercover Santa

'He says he's a friend of the Santa Claus.'

'So that's why his nose is always red!'

"It's just temporary, Comet, until Rudolph feels better."

'I've got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is Wally fell into the sanding machine. The good news is he's nice and smooth.'