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"The usual"

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

Camel rider sees sign stating: The Next Mirage 16 miles.

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"The bagels are better in New York."

Heimlich maneuver, Gastric bypass surgery, Liver transplant.

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

'The customer is always right...'

Maitre d' to astronaut couple entering restaurant: 'Gravity or no-gravity?'

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

'Excellent cork, go ahead and pour.'

'I'll have the steak.' (Fish in tank start jumping for joy).

"My apologies, but that's not a meatball. That's my computer mouse. I've been looking for it."

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

'Oh boy, my favourite: Cheese Fondue...'

'I'm afraid things are rather confused around here today, sir- the Soup of the Day is a grilled-cheese sandwich'

"The flounder's not bad, but it's you I'm nuts about."

'If that is a toenail, it is a French toenail.'

"Got anything not so close to the kitchen?"

"Dinner looks delicious."

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

'I dreamed I was flying and I had airline food.'

Traditional Family Meals

'Waiter...!' (there is a human in my soup)

"There's a free pudding for whoever finds the Chef's glass eye."