Saloons Pillows

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

'Eh, love. The one armed bandit at the end of the bar isn't working.'

Out To Lynch

Pampered and poodled.

The embarrassment of mistaking a salon for a saloon.

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

"Every Thursday I do her nails."

"Oh, I almost forgot: This time, if you have a good hand, don’t say, 'Meowee!'"

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

"That conditioner you recommended didn't do a damn bit of good."

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

'I'm lookin' for the man who shot m' paw.'

Cattlemans Saloon.

"Watch yourself Sheriff....Looks like Billy the Kid is back in town!"

'I love your new flat screen saloon.'

'You don't have to worry about me, I just want to know who does your nails.'

"Yes, I have a home where the buffaloroam. Are you in the market?"

A robber halds up a hair salon with a hairdryer pointed at the customers - 'Hand over all your hair restorer or I'll blow you away!'

'That's the great Scottish Indian fighter, Hawkeye the Noo!'

'My best client? You must be kidding. When she comes I work like for four people but I only receive one person's tips.'

Galoots in cahoots

'Hey you two! Take that outside!'

"So... You must be Billy the Kid..."

'I was in one of them tooth for a tooth squabbles.'

"The cost of a haircut? It depends on what's in your underpants."

"I can't right now. My spurs are stuck together."

'I like doing shampoos, it gets your hands clean.'

"This time lick my entire body."

"I can write beautiful poems, but they all rhyme with gin."

TV Guide: Cowboy Cowboys.

'Soon as the roundup is over and we head for a saloon we'll need a volunteer to be the designated drover.'

"Listen honey, I don't claim to be no expert but I reckon you're going about this cowpuncher thing the whole wrong way."

'That's the last straw, mister.'

"This hot tub isn't big enough for both of us either."

Squirrel Salon