Saloon Story Fan Gifts

The Stranger

"I'd say this pair of sixes beats your hand."

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'

Motorcycles tied to hitching post outside a western saloon

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

"What'll ya have?"

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

"Oh, I almost forgot: This time, if you have a good hand, don’t say, 'Meowee!'"

Brewery Lorry has Saloon Doors.

'Oh yeah. He's the fastest in the west alright. The fastest out of town, at the first sight of trouble.'

"Watch yourself Sheriff....Looks like Billy the Kid is back in town!"

'When I said loosen your buckle and let 'em drop, I was talking about your gunbelt.'

"You must be new around here, pardner."

Cattlemans Saloon.

I could clean up this town if I could keep my gun belt on.

'That's the great Scottish Indian fighter, Hawkeye the Noo!'

"Watch yourself, stranger. I've got an itchy trigger finger."

"Listen...Tonight I'll decide when I've had enough"

'Oh sure, he's the fastest in the west alright, until it comes to buying a round.'

"So... You must be Billy the Kid..."

'Soon as the roundup is over and we head for a saloon we'll need a volunteer to be the designated drover.'

"Listen honey, I don't claim to be no expert but I reckon you're going about this cowpuncher thing the whole wrong way."

'I was in one of them tooth for a tooth squabbles.'

"And don't ever try to use your smartphone during trivia night again!"

Trigger happy hour 6 - 7.

'That's the last straw, mister.'

Saloon Selectives

"This hot tub isn't big enough for both of us either."

"It's the Florida kid."

'EEEEEHA!!' 'WHISKEY!' 'What's the magic word?'