Salon Work Gifts

"Okay, who left the drier on suck instead of blow?"

'More PRODUCT please Marvin'. Marvin the hairdressers assistant tops up the product.

The adoration of the gels.

Pampered and poodled.

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

The Coiffing - to Illustrate poem 'The Ballad of a Barber'

Hair Traffic control.

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

"Every Thursday I do her nails."

"That conditioner you recommended didn't do a damn bit of good."

'Well you tried, but be sure to keep Proof of Purchase.'

Great job on the color! Thanks. It looks totally natural. Hi, Twig! Hey. Success! She didn't notice. "Mom dyed her hair with Gatorade."

'-and we offer trauma counselling at no extra cost!'

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

"Couldn't you have waited till she was smiling before you injected the botox?"

Judge getting hair done.

GURLERS

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

'You don't have to worry about me, I just want to know who does your nails.'

'I love your new flat screen saloon.'

"Ed can't figure out if we're having our nails waxed and our faces painted, or our nails painted and faces waxed."

"Rare, medium or well done?"

Beauty Bee

The Garra Rufa's idea of a Grand Day Out.

"So what's your success rate?"

'My best client? You must be kidding. When she comes I work like for four people but I only receive one person's tips.'

A robber halds up a hair salon with a hairdryer pointed at the customers - 'Hand over all your hair restorer or I'll blow you away!'

"You've been ages,dear-but never mind I've been patiently waiting in the pub accross the road!"

"He spoils them."

Where Mom used to take you.

Jo's Beauty Salon. On vacation. Closed for Summer. That's when things got ugly.

'I like doing shampoos, it gets your hands clean.'

"This time lick my entire body."

"The cost of a haircut? It depends on what's in your underpants."

'Ethel? It's Kay! A couple of those cheap lights in the tanning bed burned out again.'