Sales Spike Seeker Gifts

Loft Extensions Company - Extended Sales Chart.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

The Salesman

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

'Okay, okay, be patient!'

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

Boom

"Who's ready to see what's going to happen in the fourth quarter?"

First Church of Non-Denominational Money Worship.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

Welcome to Everest! No Loitering.

"There's gotta be a way to make money off this."

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

"So, Bob... anything you'd like to tell me about your little trip to the hunting store on Boxing Day?"

Despite the economic downturn, sales are as good as ever.

"If at first you don't succeed, buy, buy again."

Customer Convention

'I want a refund. They only shuffle.'

'Sell South Africa!'

Business Outlook

'You must have one arm shorter than the other.'

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

'I took my money out of the bank and put it into municipal bonds...'

Mountain climbers find a family picnicing on top of the mountain

Old Joe was determined to reach the summit as he'd left his false teeth up there last week!

"I suppose you're wondering why I've summoned you here at 3 AM, minion." "I try not to wonder." "After crunching the numbers, I've determined we'd increase profits by being open 24/7." "We're in the suburbs. Everyone's asleep." "Not true. By being closed at 3 AM, we're missing out on the potentially-lucrative Igor the Wino clientele." "Go to the alley and give Igor a 1-for-the-price-of-2 coupon." "Very bad man."