Sales Seeker Gifts

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

'It's not just about buying gifts. Job security and a healthy economy, that's the true meaning of Christmas.'

Irregulars

"Holding her purse? First time?"

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

'I don't need a GPS. I'm guided by greed.'

"Go Boxing Day shopping if you want...you couldn't drag me to that mall today!"

Furniture being sent out of the shop ('everything must go').

'I don't know why you don't wait a week or so, they're bound to have a closing down sale!!'

I brake for all 50 off Sales.

'And on the 8th day God held a sale'

"Please guide me on my journey...give me the knowledge and wisdom to make the right choices...and it would be great if these choices were on sale, too."

The Online Shopaholic

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

'Is that the sweet smell of success or some imitation air freshener?'

Muscles

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

Go! Means NOW!

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

Teamwork!

'Congratulations on breaking through the glass ceiling of the company downstairs. However, I will be sending you a repair bill.'

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'