Salad Judge T-Shirts

"I find your ruling on the avocado-grapefruit-and-pomegranate salad overly narrow."

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

"It comes with a small Greek salad."

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

Surprise in the salad bowl

'Diet considerations.'

"May I take your plate or are you still nibbling?"

"It's been 10 years Martha, why are we still eating quinoa?"

Vegetables VS Junk Food.

"Some protein with my salad? Sure, put a 24 ounce Ribeye in it."

'I didn't know it was a one-trip salad bar!'

Vegetarian Restaurant: Choose Your Own Cabbage

All-You-Should-Eat Buffet

An art director eats: 'Waiter! Does this lettuce say 'salad' to you?'

The famous Walled-off salad.

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious day when you're ripe and not yet mealy?"

The Perfect Garden.

'He left it to me. Isn't a double Salmanazar of '55 Chateau Cheval Blanc the perfect match with the side garden salad?'

'It's great that you made your own salad, dear, but those aren't croutons, they're dog kibbles.'

The real reason salad aids weight loss

"I want proof that I even need that much iron before I go eating all that spinach."

All you can eat salad bar has lifetime price.

"It's got lettuce and pickle...why can't we call it a salad."

'What! No garnish or side salad?'

Gustav Mahler orders a salad.

"Now, who ordered the salad?"

'We've decided to split the Caesar salad.'

"Would it help if I ate a salad?"

"What do I recommend Sir? Well, looking at your waistline, I'd recommend a salad!"

"Sure, dead meat is good...it's just that sometimes I'd like a nice salad or a fruit cup!"

"Now, which one of the Thousand Islands is this?"