Safety Analyst Pillows

"Wow...a new study came out and it says 60% of house fly deaths are from swattings. We may want to consider moving outdoors."

Fire Sprinkler Manufacturing

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Executive ignores wet floor warning and slides down hall

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

'It was going well - until his power suit short-circuited.'

"Why don't you start with tennis balls?!"

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

'Mind you don't wake the baby.'

"We'll get there when we get there!"

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

Time Out For Teddy

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

"The sign ruins our surprise attack, but it's a big OSHA fine if we don't have it."

Job Safety - Hardhat.

Nuclear waste.

'Business is booming.' - at Uncle Bert's Explosives

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

"Seriously Dad, it totally wasn't my fault."

Computer Controlled Car

'Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to our new 'health and safety' officer.'

The hall of bad ideas.

Is this what they call inherent safety?

"How would you rate your toleration for risk?"

Wear a helmet

'Notice the nice safety feature...crash-proof bumpers!'